Liebster Award 2017

Hello all!

I know I haven't been around lately but Christa Simpson nominated me for the Liebster Award, so here I am! Typically, I don't do these sorts of things, especially the last few years so I figured why not?

Here we go. :)

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Rules:

1. Thank the person who nominated you. CHECK!

2. Answer the 11 questions they gave you.

3. Nominate 11 blogs.

4. Give them 11 questions to answer.


Christa's Questions:

If you could have lunch with any author, who would you pick?

I would have to say Eloisa James. She's been a historical romance author, one I've followed for a very long time now, and I met her once in person, but the chance to sit down with her to chat would be amazing.

What made you start blogging in the first place?

Back when I first decided to write and publish my work, everybody had a blog they would write in. I would say most did it to address their readers, especially if they hadn't published their first book yet, so that's why I did it, too. So, I began blogging the same year I did my first NaNoWriMo in 2012. 

What’s the best post you’ve ever written? (in your humble opinion)

Hmm, that's a bit of a tough one. I would say any post talking about my autism and how it affects my life would be a good one. So, the best one would be...this one.

Name an author you admire because of his or her social skill or amazing marketing habits.

I don't really know one, honestly. Mostly because I don't pay attention to that sort of thing. Sorry!

The best book I read in 2017 was…

Gosh, I haven't read as much as I should've this last year. Looking back over the books I have and can recall, I would say FORBIDDEN by TABITHA SUZUMA. I remember tearing up a time or two while reading that one.

If you could choose one food or drink to have no calories, what would it be?

Pizza. Because I love to eat pizza and it's just something I would eat all the time if I could.

Sand or snow and why?

Ugh, if I could choose neither, I would because I don't like the way sand feels on my body and I despise the snow because it means cold weather. However, if I have to choose, then sand, because that symbolizes warm weather and summer to me!

What does your typical Saturday involve? Share what a day in your shoes would be like!

As of now, my typical Saturday will be one of two things: either I'm at home with my husband, his two kids and my son on the weekends they are over visiting or....I'm at my new job as a nursing aide after 2:30 pm until nearly 11 at night. Before that, I'm probably on my computer goofing off once I wake up because I stayed up too late the night before.

How much introvert and how much extrovert are you?

Eh, I'm mostly introvert, about 90%. I'm only an extrovert when I really, really want to be and that's very rarely. I just like keeping to myself and stay rather quiet most of the time.

What is your favourite inspirational quote?

Wow. I really had to think about this one. My favorite one used to be about dancing in the rain, but I would say that's changed over the years. I went looking for quotes, for a new one because well, I needed a new one. And this is the one I chose: If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome. ~Michael Jordan

And of course, this ties into my life (as well as perhaps that of others) because sometimes we tend to believe of ourselves what others do of us, which can be limiting if others don't expect anything of us at all. I will freely admit that I used to believe less in myself because nobody expected anything from me, but not anymore. I'm more, and can do more, than others think I can, and I think my life shows that.

What are you working on now, or what/when are you planning to release next?

Anyone who follows me knows that a few months ago, I basically said I was done with publishing as I've been doing it. In that time, I took a free training program to become a nursing aide and a week ago, I passed the state test, so I'm certified. I have a full-time job right now, but wouldn't you know...the writing itch doesn't go away just because you need to walk away from it. So I have been working on something, except it isn't a traditional romance. In fact, it's a tragic romance, and I've got about 20,000 words of it written. I don't know when it will be done or when I'll release it, but there you go. Violet Haze isn't gone forever, just available in a different form now.

Until next time, readers! ;)

Now for my nominations...

Note: I've chosen other authors. I don't really follow or know many blogs these days, so I wanted to give my fellow romance authors a wave hello this time!  And I don't have 11 but ah well, :)

Alison Foster - https://authoralisonfoster.wixsite.com/alisonfoster/blog

Aubrey Gross - http://aubreygross.com/blog-2/

Josie Litton - http://josielittonbooks.blogspot.com/

Michelle Zink - http://michellezink.com/

Kathryn L James - https://kathrynljames.wordpress.com/author/kathrynljames/

Crystal Kaswell - http://www.crystalkaswell.com/category/blog/

My questions for the nominees:

  1. What is the first book that made you cry?
  2. Did you ever have an author you disliked at first but love now?
  3. What kind of romance do you write?
  4. What is your favorite restaurant?
  5. What country could you live in if you had to leave your current one?
  6. Paper, plastic, or reusable?
  7. Name your favorite place to travel and tell why you love it.
  8. If you couldn't write anymore, what would you do instead?
  9. You receive $750,000, tax free, and you can't pay bills with it. What would you do?
  10. What is, in your opinion, the best book you've written so far?
  11. Tell readers what you're working on now and when you plan on releasing it!

End of a Journey

When I wrote & published my first full novel back in 2013, I never thought about where I would be four years later. So much in my personal life has changed since then, not to mention how I've grown emotionally following my autism diagnosis, and one of the things I've learned how to do in that time is to let go when it's time.

I've never written for anyone except myself. The stories I wrote all contain a piece, or many pieces, of me, and none of them would be what they are if they hadn't come from me. But I published to make money, to earn something from these stories in my heart, in order to make it through life, and in some ways, doing so has turned the writing that heals my wounds into a stressful job. Into something I do because I "have to" instead of for the pure joy of it.

I've thought about this for over a year. In fact, I almost stopped publishing last year but I kept on because it was the only source of money I had. In truth, things aren't better financially for me, but I can't write like this and I surely can't publish things not worth publishing just to make a buck. I don't write to market, never have, and I won't start now.

And I'm not going to whine. I'm not going to tell you all the reasons why I'm stepping away. I'm not going to draw attention to myself with absurd antics, or discount my books before pulling them down from all retailers. No, see, my books aren't going anywhere. They'll be there, for the next reader to discover, and I really hope they are loved by many.

But me...I'm going to find something else to do. I'm going to spend time with my family and let what will be, be. I'm letting go because it is too painful to remain holding on any longer in this business. And If...one day...I manage to finish writing another book, I'll publish it quietly on retailers and on this site for all of you, my readers. Because you've been so supportive all these years and I thank you for that, with all my heart. It means more to me than I can ever, ever convey.

Otherwise, I really hope the rest of your year is fabulous, and that each year after that is better than the last and you continue to find lots of amazing books to enjoy.

Thank you for reading.

Love Always,

Violet

The Exhaustion of Autism

One of the hardest things for me to deal with as an autistic person is people not understanding what life is like on a daily basis. Nobody has any idea how much energy goes into ensuring I don't mess up too badly or that I "get things done" when they need doing. Well, they might, but many people in my life didn't until I received my diagnosis, and even then, it's hard for them to understand sometimes.

In 2016, I wrote a blog post called The Exhaustion of Autism, and today, I'm sharing the post again (with some slight edits to make it more general audience appropriate!) because this is one piece that really means a lot to me. I've also added a bit to the end. This expands on what being autistic can be like for someone. I hope you enjoy and thanks for reading.

Ever been so tired after a busy day that you sit down and before you know it, you’re waking up out of nowhere and it’s the next day already...when you weren’t even finished with the day before? This has been my reality since I was young. A few hours of an activity that didn’t involve being at home, and for the next day or even two, I’m so tired I can’t do anything except lay around and sleep. The exhaustion of autism is real and tangible in my everyday life.

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I am not perfect...

These past couple of weeks have personally been hell for me.

I don't tell you any of this for your sympathy or pity. In fact, I write this blog for me and share it because if something I write helps even one person, I'm glad. Overall, though, this is where my feelings about things go, and yes, it's about my writing and my personal life and anything else I feel like including at the time I make a post.

But, back to the hell.

For the most part, I spent the week following my emergency surgery lying in bed. Okay, I kind of had to for some of it, but otherwise, I didn't get out of bed unless it was to go to the bathroom or shove something resembling food down my throat. I cried, I raged internally, and I even probably picked fights with my husband. (I did.)

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